This week’s review is in honor of the memorial, well not holiday so to speak, but observance. August 31st is International Overdose Awareness Day and I wrote a piece, a long post really, on where my head was. For those of you who don’t know, I survived an OD the summer of 2009. You can read more about my experience in a few old pieces or by checking out my podcasts.

Anyway, I recently ‘met’ another bomb ass podcaster in recovery, named Mack, who published a fictionalized version of her story in the first season of the podcast F*ckin Sober. And in honor of International Overdose Awareness Day, I think it’s a good one to review.

Now, one quick disclosure, as I am wont to do. Mack and I have had a few discussions on working together as she produces future seasons. But, as you’ll see, I don’t pull the punches I think the show deserves (although, luckily for our potential professional relationship, it deserves but a few).

The first season of F*ckin Sober follows Anita Drake as she reaches a turning point in her life, which I won’t spoil here, and decides the answer is to quit drinking. The show does a good job of illustrating the person Anita was before she reached this point, and an even better job of putting the listener in the mind of Anita as she stumbles through the first 90 days of sobriety.

It’s an 8-part series produced and primarily voiced by Mack, but the show is clearly one of those ‘it takes a village’ podcasts. While Mack is the driving force behind it, she is quick to let anyone who asks know that there were so many other talented individuals who played roles, from voice actors to musicians to advisors whose advice helped the show reach the level of crisp professionalism that is evident from the first moment you hit play.

There’s a lot to like about the show. It’s accessible. Listeners can find numerous moments to identify with Anita. Almost overly so. There were a few times I cringed and, even for a guy like me who lives full out, felt like we were getting a bit TOO much of her. Like, we REALLY get to know Anita. From her masturbation habits and fantasies to her bowl movements, we truly, deeply, know Anita. And considering Anita is a fictional representation of Mack, I both applaud Mack’s ability as a storyteller for bringing this person to life and think of the old writer’s credo: write what you know.

I also can’t say enough about Mack’s ability to make people truly care about Anita. There was a point in Episode 4 (I’ll get to that in a minute) where I was close, real close, to turning off the show. Not because it was bad, but because of one piece that wasn’t relatable to me. But something stopped me: my true desire to know what happened to Anita. By the end of the show, I was rooting for her. Not just to stay sober, but to truly get healthy, to succeed, to grow. I found myself actually caring about her like a friend or a loved one. Which, and I say this as someone who produced a documentary, is really hard to do! So props to Mack.

The one part of the story that really didn’t sit well with me is going to be hard to relate here but I’ll try. While during one episode, Mack does a good job of helping both the listener, and Anita herself, question the “cult” of AA, which was nice to hear, the first season of this show comes close to serving as an extended ad for AA. And despite what your Granny or Auntie told you, AA isn’t for everyone. AA is AMAZING, when it works. And if you’re reading this, and AA saved you or your brother/mother/sister/father etc., I’m SO happy for you!

But AA’s success rate (for other substances than alcohol) has been estimated to be around 8% when used alone. And for alcohol (literally the first A) it’s estimated to be around 1 in 3. Not great. And there are other issues with AA that I won’t get into here because it’s not really important.

Now, AA used with other methods has a much higher success rate. Which is awesome! As someone who got into recovery (but not sobriety, there is a difference although the Venn diagram for the two communities is very close to being the same circle) without AA’s help, I both wish I had the support that AA offers and am glad I didn’t have the baggage that comes with it for too many people. And while Anita, and by extension Mack, did an AWESOME job showing both how AA can be the right move and at the same time problematic for someone trying to enter recovery, Anita ONLY uses AA in this show.

This is what almost made me turn it off in Episode 4, when Mack really focuses the most on AA’s brand. I was screaming at my phone “Anita, use other methods too!” There’s one quick reference to therapy, but nothing to say that Anita is seeing a therapist for her underlying issues. There’s no mention of other methodologies like harm reduction or medically assisted treatment. She doesn’t even examine if full AA-branded sobriety is the right move for her, instead of trying other ideas like drinking a little less or not drinking but using medical marijuana (an idea that is growing rapidly in popularity). She just decides to accept full-blown sobriety as the only way. Just AA. And that upset me. Because while Anita made it past 90 days (where the show ends) and, we’re led to believe, stayed sober, which is AMAZING, it’s super rare that someone makes it into sobriety their first time without a relapse only using AA’s methodology.

Look, this isn’t a knock on Mack. Laying out the full picture of recovery wasn’t her goal with this series. And I think that 99 out of 100 people listening to this show would never pick up on these things the way that I did. But as someone working in this industry who already made a series about someone’s story of recovery and chose to highlight some of these ideas and explore the wider recovery world, I kept hoping this examination would be coming soon, just after the next moment Anita did or didn’t call her ex or lamented her over-the-top roommate. And that exploration I was dying for never came.

I know; that was more wishful thinking on my part. And I acknowledge that. I recognize my desire for the show to do this was akin to begging baseball announcers to mention how poorly minor leaguers are paid whenever they discuss prospects or hoping true crime podcasts reveal that police clearance rates have never been lower at the same time the percent of our country’s budget going toward law enforcement has never been higher. I am an activist through and through and I can’t turn off that part of my brain, as much as I wish I could sometimes.

None of this kept me from finishing the series, nor will it keep me from cheering on Mack to make more seasons. And it definitely won’t keep me from recommending the show to all of you.

I give Season 1 of F*cking Sober a solid 9 out of 10.

You can listen to Season 1 (and hopefully more seasons soon!) of F*cking Sober at their website, or on Great Pods!